Tell us a bit about yourself
Kelly Shibari: I’m a Japanese-Irish MILF – bilingual, bicultural, and bisexual, haha. The porn industry was a “bucket list” life experience I never thought I’d be invited to do; I consider myself super lucky, in how I’ve been able to add this career to all of my other experiences, and even win awards from pretty much every award show out there. I’m also a majorly dorky, introverted nerd, with a pretty twisted sense of humor.
What are your stats/measurements?
Kelly Shibari: I’m 38G-32-42, 5’7”, and 195 lbs (Size 12/14).
How did you start within the industry?
Kelly Shibari: I had been a touring roadie, as well as a mainstream production designer, ever since the 1990s, and was super happy in those careers…but in 2006, there was a huge Writer’s Strike (WGA) in Hollywood, which seems to happen every time there is a contract negotiation, but this strike included pretty much everyone in the industry, not just the writers.
A friend of mine told me he and his girlfriend were shooting content for PlayboyTV’s “Amateur Home Videos,” and suggested that I give porn a try (I think he was secretly just wanting to get into my pants, lol). I didn’t know at the time how plus size porn had become popular until he told me – I only knew the porn I saw on cable tv at the time, and I hadn’t really watched a lot of porn on the internet yet.
Once he showed me how some studios were making beautiful plus size porn, though, I sent my photos in to see if the most famous BBW porn site would take me. When The Score Group booked me pretty much right away and even flew me out to Florida for a multiple-day shoot, I took the job immediately and had so much fun in Miami. Then, once I got back to LA, I knew I wanted to stay in this business for as long as the industry would have me.
How do you fell about the term BBW?
Kelly Shibari: I think “BBW” is a term which was popularized in the early 2000s as part of the body acceptance / body positivity movement. By the way, the male equivalent is “BHM (Big Handsome Man).” Over the years, “BBW” has become more of a porn term, and “Plus Size” seems to have become the mainstream terminology. Personally, I prefer the term “Plus Size,” since it doesn’t restrict my work to just porn, but that’s just me.
Can you pick three moments in your adult career that stand out and explain why?
Kelly Shibari: Winning a Feminist Porn Award for PaddedKINK, a plus size kink site which was established because kink sites were stating they weren’t interested in shooting BBW performers.
Getting to co-produce, co-direct, and write / cast the only sex ed film for people of size, “Guide to Wicked Sex: Plus Size,” with Wicked Pictures and jessica drake… which then went on to win awards, be covered in mainstream media, and have to be duplicated several times because it kept selling out.
Getting to be in Penthouse Forum as the cover story / cover model, and having that issue sell out within a month…which lead to a Penthouse Pop Shots photo spread in their main magazine, as the first plus size model in that magazine’s history.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?
Kelly Shibari: A year ago, we didn’t expect to be in the middle of a pandemic, BLM protests, and planet-wide unrest. I have a feeling I will probably have moved on from performing 5 years from now, since I’ll be 53 by then, but who knows? As a “life experience” person, I’m just looking forward to what new life experiences might be thrown my way.
How did you create the name?
Kelly Shibari: “Kelly” is so because it’s a fairly unisex name which hints at my half-Irish heritage, but also is a nod to pop culture tv characters like Kelly Kapowski and Kelly Bundy…and Shibari is in reference to the Japanese rope bondage I got into in my private life, before getting into porn.
What do you enjoy most about being a pornstar?
Kelly Shibari: Surprisingly, as an introvert, this career actually works really well – I don’t have to commute to an office every day! You’re also, especially these days, really able to experiment with all of the different ways to express your sexuality, play with technology, work your own hours, and find the people who enjoy your work. I absolutely love my fans, and they’ve been awesome in helping me figure out how to entertain them best!
Which pornstar would you most like to work with?
Kelly Shibari: The interesting thing is, after taking 4 years off from performing, there are SO MANY new performers out there…I really can’t choose just one!
You beat cancer! Can you tell us about how you first discovered that you had cancer?
Kelly Shibari: I did! I’d actually known something was off for years, and assumed it was my thyroid because all of the symptoms matched…but every year, my doctor would look at my chart and tell me I didn’t have any problems because it didn’t show in my bloodwork. Then, a couple of weeks after my Penthouse shoot, I got an ultrasound because I had a visible goiter, and no amount of bloodwork was going to convince me that I was ok. Two days later, I was told I had a malignancy, and based on its size, that it had been slowly growing for the better part of a decade. I immediately put all of my performing work on hold, and scheduled surgery.
Can you tell us the treatment you went through and what it was like?
Kelly Shibari: Thyroid cancer can be a relatively manageable experience compared to other cancers – there was no chemo in my case – but if left untreated, it can completely mess up your metabolic system, affect your menstrual cycle, your hair, nails, skin, and lots more. I was in the hospital for 3 days, and then went home… but since then, it’s been quarterly blood tests and adjusting my medication levels, which is something I will have to do for the rest of my life.
What was it like when you found out that you had beaten cancer? How did you celebrate?
Kelly Shibari: Talk about a sigh of relief to get out of surgery and know it was all gone, but to get the official “no cancer” diagnosis a year later was definitely amazing. No real celebration though – I still have these quarterly tests and adjustments to do – but I’m thrilled it was not a long, drawn-out process to get rid of the cancer.
When people are going through a difficult event, they often promise them self a reward at the end, how did you reward yourself? I don’t really do the “reward” thing, actually – maybe it’s the “life experience” thing, or something else, but I just take these sorts of things as they happen, even if the outcome isn’t what you wanted. Everything is a lesson of one kind or another, and I feel rewarding yourself implies you also punish yourself…I’d rather just float in the middle these days, and work on just staying content as often as possible.
What support from the adult industry and your fans did you receive while you had cancer?
Kelly Shibari: Actually, I told a couple of colleagues, and made a Tumblr to share my journey, but otherwise didn’t send out any press releases or start any fundraising or anything like that – I’m lucky to have amazing insurance and had a brilliant care team with the surgery. The people who knew were super supportive, but weren’t local so they kept distance, which was actually perfect for me – I’m not good with a lot of noise.
Have you ever been grossed out during a shoot?
Kelly Shibari: I was on set a few times, early in my career, for some super low budget studios. Often, the place either looked like a creepy basement apartment (and belonged to the director), or something just smelled bad…and I didn’t want to find out if it was body odor, dirty laundry, or what. Sometimes you just have to draw the line and cancel the shoot for your own sanity and health! Luckily I haven’t had that sort of experience in close to a decade now, thankfully.
Has the stigma around the adult industry affected you?
Kelly Shibari: I’ve been lucky in that I have always been, and always will be, a freelance worker. I was that way before porn, and I’ll be that way even after I stop performing. Because of that, I haven’t really had to deal with the negativity that seems to come with working outside of the industry. My parents knew I was in the industry before they passed away; I’m a confirmed bachelorette with no kids (and no desire to have any). I have the luxury (and I know it is a luxury) of not having to answer to anyone for any of my life decisions, which is probably why I haven’t had to deal with a lot of the issues I’ve read about.
What's the weirdest thing that you’ve been asked to do during a shoot?
Kelly Shibari: I worked for a director-shooter once, who referred to pussies as chickens, as in, “Show me your chicken” during photo shoots. I’m only grateful he only said that for the close-up shots because that was hilarious!
What hobbies & interests do you have outside of the adult industry?
Kelly Shibari: As a former production designer, I am absolutely fascinated with anything related to architecture, interior design, DIY, home remodeling, etc. I’m actually in the middle of remodeling my house, but had to put a lot of the bigger projects on hold because of the pandemic and quarantine.
Do you use sex toys? If so which ones?
Kelly Shibari: I like to use a variety of toys on-camera, but I have to say that my go-to at home, in my off-camera life, is my Womanizer.
To date which porn scene are you most proud of & why?
Kelly Shibari: Probably any of the work I did with New Sensations / Digital Sin, though my scene with Ramon Nomar is my favorite (though fans have told me the BBG scene with Ramon and Mick Blue is theirs). Eddie Powell is an amazing director-shooter, and every scene I have every done with him has been absolutely beautiful. Beyond that, my absolute, hands-down, favorite scene of my entire career was the one I did with CJ Wright, for his own studio, before he left the industry. His work was so important in BBW porn history, and I don’t think a lot of people remember his legacy.
Do you watch porn? If so what type?
Kelly Shibari: I tend to watch hentai more than regular porn. Occasionally, I will watch…or actually, hear regular porn. I’ve been on a kick of just listening to solo male masturbation scenes… there’s something super sexy about a guy who lets go while he’s enjoying himself.
If you were interviewing a pornstar what would you ask them?
Kelly Shibari: “What did you do before porn?” I think it’s such an important question! So many people talk about what performers do “after porn,” because they’ve made assumptions based on tragic stereotypes about what sort of person gets into this industry. I think, though, especially these days, tragic porn performer origin stories are the exception to the rule.
What really turns you on?
Kelly Shibari: Gentlemen. Manners. Politeness. Compassion. There’s nothing like listening to someone consider your feelings – in times like these, I think it’s hotter than anything.
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